By Brent Zundel
For the MSU Exponent
October 4, 2012

Note: This column originally appeared as part of the Exponent’s Sugarbeet page, a satirical biweekly feature that attempts to stimulate discussion of critical community issues.

Last Friday, Sept. 28, Montana Rep. Dennis Rehberg — or “Denny,” as he is reportedly known while relaxing among lobbyists — visited the Montana State University campus on an impromptu campaign stop. After unsuccessfully attempting to pal around on the Mall with college students who desperately avoided eye contact, Rehberg spoke to a small crowd of supporters in the Student Union Building.

His speech’s overarching message was tailored to the occasion. Rehberg emphasized his concern for students, repeatedly saying, “I’m just like you!” before telling stories about his “wild nights” in an attempt to connect with members of the younger generation.

“Just like any college student, I have a solid record of making questionable life decisions involving alcohol,” Rehberg claimed. “Why, when I was in Kazakhstan with [former] Sen. Burns, I once got drunk, fell off a horse, and proceeded to call my local hosts ‘cone heads’ while making alien noises!” Read More…